When I wrote my first love letter to my pussy it was confronting and awkward. “A letter to my pussy? Why? It’s just…there.” I was in a course with other women talking about sex and desire; the latter was foreign to me, and the former was, well, something I engaged in after a night at the bar.
As new agey as the idea sounded, I sat and thought and tried to feel what was going on “down there.” As I lifted my pen to paper and scribbled, those first two words “Dear Pussy” ignited something in my belly. I wrote, not even sure in the moment, if what I was writing was the “right” way to do the assignment. The pen moved before me and the page filled with words.
I don’t remember what my first letter said but I recall my body burning, my voice cracking and a huge ball of energy wanting to explode from inside as I stood in front of the women to read my letter. I recall reading “I’m sorry,” “I will never neglect you again,” “you are powerful,” “I’m scared.” And I recall crying deeply as though a huge thorn was being pulled from my body. That first letter set me on a journey to developing a deep relationship with my pussy, with my desire, my sex, my orgasm, my power as a woman. Who knew a simple letter to a pussy held so much force.
There were so many memories stored in her. Some I enjoyed, but most I locked away and forgotten. Through the process of getting to know her, memories of shame, guilt, trauma, desire and pleasure started to come up and wash out of me. What used to be shame became normal. What used to be anger became my voice. What used to be hunger became my power. What used to be ‘good’ became ‘better.’ I will say that all this didn’t happen in just one letter. But that first letter opened my relationship to my pussy and instead of discounting her in my experiences with love, sex and intimacy, she became a part of it, and often, the driver. I came to learn that my pussy is not just a body part. It is the location of my power and my voice.
Through the 6 years of my work as an Orgasmic Meditation Trainer and Instructor, I encountered numerous women who, in one form or another, have experienced shame and trauma and a huge disconnection to their pussy, like I once did. And through my work with them, I see them gradually reclaiming the parts that they have locked down for so long; from anger and bitch to love and play, from sassy vixen to sophisticated business woman. I witness each woman find her true self, her voice, her flavor and wear it with confidence in her body.
These women, and those to come, inspired me to start this blog to create a space where women can start to open their relationship to their pussy and take them on a path of being who they are from desire instead of conditions. It starts with one letter. What would yours say?